Dead Man's Island, 1996

STARRING: Barbara Eden (Henrie O)

Eden is of course the ever popular star of the I Dream Of Jeanie TV series.

William Shatner (Chase Prescott)

It's Captain Kirk, enough said. I heard Shatner speak once when I was in Las Vegas. He is currently starring in the top rated series Boston Legal.

Morgan Fairchild (Valerie St. Vincent)

In addition to her roles in the likes of Flamingo Road and Falcon Crest, Morgan has enjoyed many guest appearances in recent years including playing Chandler’s mother on Friends and Andrea Thorpe, Doctor Dick’s second wife, on Cybil.

Roddy McDowall (Trevor Dunnaway)

McDowall starred in all 5 of the original Planet Of The Apes Movies and the short-lived TV series. He passed away in 1998.

Traci Lords (Miranda Prescott)

Lords biggest TV role to date was playing Jill on the hit TV series Profiler during its second season. Her acting career took off in 1988 after starring in a remake of the 50's b-movie 'Not Of This Earth'.

With David Faustino (yes, Bud Bundy) and Christopher Atkins.

PLOT: Henrie O. (Eden) is a journalist who is called to a mysterious island by her old flame, Chase (Shatner). Someone is trying to kill him and he suspects it could be any one of his friends and family who are currently on the island with him. He wants Henrie O. to use her investigative skills find out who it is before it’s too late.

No sex, very mild violence, no language, TV-PG/PG.

THOUGHTS: This was a pilot for a potential series along the lines of Murder, She Wrote. In fact it’s from the same writer and producer. The all-star cast do a good job and the story is quite engaging and exciting, though I could do without the scenes of Shatner in his bathing suit! Somehow I just can’t see him and Traci Lords as a married couple either. I think perhaps she should've swapped characters with Morgan Fairchild, but who needs realism! It's a TV movie!

It plays much like an episode of the aforementioned murder mystery series which kind of begs the question, what’s the point? Eden is certainly no Angela Lansbury. The bad Southern accents she and Lords put on could've used a little more practice too. Although it's likable enough I’m not surprised the show didn’t get past this stage.

CAN I BUY IT? Used on ex-rental VHS in the UK.

They Shoot Divas, Don't They? (2001)

STARRING: Jennifer Beals (Sloane McBride)

Beals is best known for her role in the hit 80’s movie Flashdance, most recently she has had a starring role in the TV series The L Word

Kerri Lynn Pratt (Jenny)

Pratt can be seen in the TV series Jack & Bobby, she has also had roles in the movies Cruel Intentions 2 and Fat Albert.

And Traci Lords (as Mira Long)

B-movie ventran and techno queen!

PLOT: Demanding washed up pop diva Sloan McBride (Beals) hires a new assistant who turns out to be more than she bargained for.

No sex, no language, some moderate violence, PG/TV-13.

THOUGHTS: An extremely well made movie considering it was made for VH1 on a very tiny budget. There are lots of nice locations and some great songs performed by Beals herself! The story is pretty straight forward - Jenny is a psycho with a grudge. I really like this movie and have watched it a couple of times now. It airs infrequently on the Hallmark channel in the UK.

CAN I BUY IT? DVD, R1.

Not Of This Earth, 1988

CREW: Jim Wynorski (Director)

Wynorski has made hundreds of low budget films like this.

STARRING: Traci Lords (Nadine)

Traci was America’s #1 porn star until she got busted by the FBI in 1986 for being under age. Shortly afterward she went to acting school and began forging a professional mainstream career. Since this movie Traci’s career has progressed nicely with major roles in TV series’ like Melrose Place, Profiler and the Sci-Fi Channel’s First Wave. In 1995 she recorded her first CD 1,000 Fires which included the #2 Billboard Club hit Control. In 2003 Traci’s autobiography became a best seller and she appeared on Larry King Live to discuss her life. Since then she has appeared in the TNT prime time series Wanted and Will & Grace.

Arthur Roberts (Mr. Johnson)

Arthur Roberts has appeared in countless b-movies since the mid-70’s and shows no signs of stopping with two new movies on the cards for 2007. Roberts had already worked with Wynorski on Chopping Mall and Big Bad Mama II, they continue to work together to this day.

Lenny Juliano (Jeremey)

Juliano has gone on to work with Jim Wynorski on over 20 other b-movies and soft-core flicks including Chopping Mall, The Sorceress and The Bare Wench Project and its sequels.

Also starring Ace Mask and Roger Lodge.

STORY: An alien (Roberts) lands on Earth to find a supply of fresh food for his dying planet. Unfortunately for us the food they need is human blood! Only his human nurse (Lords) and her boyfriend (Lodge) can stop him before its too late!

Sex, nudity, a little violence and bad language, 18/R.

THOUGHTS: This movie saw the theatrical debut of Traci Lords outside of seedy porno theatres, and while it was far from a commercial success at the box office, it’s pretty fun. As this movie was made for Roger Corman’s Concorde company you know it’s going to be cheap! In fact this movie goes so far as to use footage from other Concorde productions to make up it’s title sequence! None of the vast array of spaceships, monsters, aliens etc. we see have anything to do with this movie. It also features the final nude scene ever by Traci. She discusses the making of the movie in her book Underneath It All.

Not Of This Earth was originally a 50’s b-movie, it was remade for a third time in the 90’s. There’s a nice promotional standee which was sent out to video stores in 1989 to promote the video release of the movie which you can occasionally see on eBay. It features Traci Lords shielding herself, from the ‘killer eyes’ of Mr Johnson presumably.

CAN I BUY IT? Yes, it’s on DVD! It’s just the standard version of the movie with a commentary by Wynorski and Juliano.